A word about your bills - pay them! I'm not talking about debt here (car note, mortgage, student loans) - we'll save that for another discussion. I'm talking about your household expenses - the basics - such as rent, utilities, phone, even internet is a necessity when you have kids. Pay your bills, simple enough - right?
My son was born when I was 19 years old, and I officially moved out of my parents house (the first time) one year later. At age 20, with one year of college under my belt, and no real work experience, I was completely ill-equipped, financially, to be on my own, with a baby, in a one bedroom apartment and all of the expenses of running a household on one barely above minimum wage income. With no direction, and a false sense of knowing what I was doing, simply based on what my parents told me that I needed for my home, and what little, if any, information they had shared with me about fiscal responsibility, I was pretty much setup for failure. What I did not know, but learned quickly, was that if I did not pay my bills, the services that were being provided to me, would eventually be disconnected. Furthermore, if I continued to leave the services unpaid, they would be reported on my credit as a bad debt, thus, lowering the credit score that I did not even know I had. In my case, it was a cable bill, which I didn't even need to have in the first place. Obviously, my issue at the time was that I did not have enough income to cover all of my expenses, which leads me to share this bit of wisdom: If you are unable to pay your bills in full, do not just ignore them.
Fast forward a few years from my cable bill issue, and my son and I are once again on our own. This time, in a two bedroom apartment, with a little more education and a much better paying job. Yes, I was making it happen and so proud of myself! Still no more knowledgeable about how to handle my finances, and now taking on debt that I did not need (trying to keep up with my friends who were either childless or had financial support systems), all while trying to maintain my household expenses. Now, I'm looking at a past due electric bill versus a currently due car payment, and let's not forget about my weekly daycare bill - thus, my introduction to "robbing Peter to pay Paul". What I ended up doing was contacting the electric company and making payment arrangements that would allow me to wait for another paycheck, so that I could take care of daycare and car note.
What I have learned over time - from my own personal experience as a solo mom riding the "figure out how to make ends meet" roller coaster, and also as a collector of almost every consumer debt imaginable - is that there is usually a way to work around the issue of needing funds immediately to cover all of the bills at once. Contact your service providers and/or creditors to make workable payment arrangements or ask for help before things get out of control and you end up paying them more money than you can truly afford. In regards to rent and utilities, you can research to find local community organizations that may be able to help with past due amounts to possibly prevent eviction or service disruption.
As a solo mom, you likely do not have anyone to rely on if you are in need, so in order to have less stress and be sure that your children are not negatively affected by poor financial choices, then your goal should always be to maintain a successful balance between your income and your household expenses. Educating yourself on finances and creating a realistic budget are a start. Be sure to involve your children and educate them on creating and maintaining your household budget. This should be worked as a family, and in turn will allow your kids to have a better understanding of how the money is spent.
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